Looking Good in High Heels

Sarah Palin has spent more than $150,000 on clothes and accessories since gaining the VP nomination in August. Some people are outraged and consider it an extravagance, but not me. It costs a lot of money to look that good, and Governor Palin looks pretty good to me. You see her walking in 4-inch red high heels -- you think that's easy? Try it.

I salute the beautiful women of America, and I support the cosmetic and fashion industries. Women spend billions of dollars on makeup, jewelry, pedicures, and so forth, for the worthy cause of Looking Good.

When a woman says she needs new shoes -- well, there's a lot of dumb men out there who reply, "but you already have a lot of shoes."

For me, these are feminine mysteries and their perfume is designed to intoxicate and befuddle us.

It's just the nature of things.

Now, America has plenty of problems, and this fashion commentary in no way constitutes a political endorsement of Sarah Palin. I have no problem with her life, I just won't vote for her.

In fact, we need more amateurs in government -- not as President or Vice-President -- but we have fifty states and we ought to more often take a flyer on the man or woman on the street. We should put some of that plain talk in the Congress too.

I have learned to do Twitter. You can find it at Twitter.com. If you need an explanation about how to do Twitter, than you can't do it. It's one of those things like Ken Kesey's Magic Bus, where the Merry Pranksters said, "You're either on the bus, or you're off the bus."

Twitter is a Zen koan -- I can feel hundred of readers becoming confused right now, but bear with me. The trick is you DON'T figure it out.

All right, I should tell the story sometime about how I rode on the Magic Bus, back in 1967, with Ken Kesey and Neil Cassidy. It was an astounding experience -- but some other time.

Barack Obama has suspended his campaign for two days to visit his beloved, but ailing grandmother in Hawaii.

Gallup polls conducted on a global basis, show that Obama is preferred by a huge margin in countries such as France, Korea, and Canada. May be we should listen to our friends.

I close with this news story from Blue Ash, Ohio, and ask your opinion "Whose football is it?"

Ohio woman, 89, accused of keeping kids' football


BLUE ASH, Ohio (AP) — Police in Ohio say an 89-year-old woman was facing a charge of petty theft because neighborhood children accused her of refusing to give back their football. Edna Jester was arrested last week in the Cincinnati suburb of Blue Ash.

Police said one child's father complained that Jester kept the youngsters' ball after it landed in her yard. Police Capt. James Schaffer said there has been an ongoing dispute in the neighborhood over kids' balls landing in the woman's yard.

Jester said Monday she has received many calls and didn't have time to discuss the matter any more.

Jester is to appear in court next month. The maximum penalty for a petty theft conviction in Ohio is six months in jail and a fine of up to $1,000.







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KEEPING THE FOOTBALL
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Fred Owens
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