Santa Barbara

By Fred Owens

Everybody likes Santa Barbara. They come here to visit and they say, "We had such a good time. It's so beautiful."

You should come to Santa Barbara this winter. You can pick oranges and persimmons off the tree. And we have really good strawberries too.

Santa Barbara has plenty of problems too. Of course it does -- this is planet Earth after all --- but it's so nice in Santa Barbara that I can't work up the energy to complain. When I lived in LaConner all I did was complain. Go around town and complain. Nothing was ever like I wished it to be. Then finally, after way too many years, I came down here for the sunshine and the waves and the beaches and the mild winters and there's nothing to complain about.

Houston, Texas.  Let me see if this makes sense to you. The first time I went to Texas was in 1967. We were hitchhiking through and we stayed over with friends at Rice University in Houston.

Just by coincidence, these same friends had invited Ken Kesey and his Merry Pranksters to come for the weekend. Kesey and his pals were on some cross-country journey to anywhere and back again. I mean, you didn't ask dumb question like "Where ya going next?"

Kesey invited us on the bus and we rode around town for a few hours and then they went on their merry way.

Now, here's the point -- Ken Kesey and the Merry Pranksters were the first people I met when I got to Texas. That was my first impression. Cool people. Nice place. So I Iiked it there.

It is true -- all the bad stuff you ever heard about Texas, completely true. But I never had any truck with those idiots so I always enjoyed myself when I was down there. I am on the track of Lyle Lovett,Willie Nelson and Armadillo World Headquarters.

However, I will not even attempt to persuade other people to change their opinion about the Lone Star State -- hate it, by all means, never go there, whatever. It's a free country.

Chicago. I grew up in Chicago, on the North Shore, near the lake. That's Cubs country. Being a young boy growing up I watched the Cubs lose year after year after year. It was a blot on my youth. Last place. Every year, last place. Losers. Nice guys, but losers. I hate the Cubs. That's why I live in California. The Dodgers are winners. I saw the Dodgers on TV in 1955 when I was nine. They beat the Yankees in seven games. I saw Johnny Podres pitch to Roy Campanella. I saw Sandy Amoros make that catch.

I was nine. I didn't want to be a loser like the Cubs. Sure, you're supposed to play fair and make your best effort and all that, but every once in a while it just feels good to win. Coach, can't we ever win? I didn't like Chicago after that. I liked the Dodgers better -- sometimes they win.I'll never go back to Chicago.

Serve the People. My friend Brian Cladoosby is chairman of the Swinomish tribal community  -- that's the reservation next to LaConner where I used to live.

I know Brian and his home and his family and his neighbors. He's doing all right. I call him The Chair. We have talked a few times in his office. He lives next door to my good friends Pat and Kevin Paul.

The news is that Brian got re-elected as President of the National Congress of America Indians.

Way to go, Brian. Cool hat! Serve the people!

I only Work for Nice People. My Craigs list ad wasn't working. It said, "Experienced gardener, expert pruner, all around energetic worker, local references, reasonable rates, etc...." But my Craigs list ad wasn't getting me any new customers. My ad was no different than a hundred other guys. So I changed the headline to, "I only Work for Nice People."  It works. Now people call me and ask me to come work for them.

But it's true. I only work for nice people.

Frog Hospital Subscription Drive.   Your contribution of $25 is greatly appreciated. The Frog Hospital newsletter has been cruising down the Internet for 16 years now. I have tried to kill this newsletter several times – tried to stomp it out like the ember from an old campfire, or dig it up like a pestiferous weed, but it won’t die – Frog Hospital just keeps on going.

So please send a check. Your contribution keeps me from getting cranky. It helps me to maintain a detached attitude. Let’s keep it going….

Go to the Frog Hospital blog and hit the PayPal button for $25,

or

Send a check for $25 to

Fred Owens

1105 Veronica Springs RD
Santa Barbara, CA 93105

 

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Fred Owens
cell: 360-739-0214

My gardening blog is  Fred Owens

My writing blog is Frog Hospital

Being a Gentleman

By Fred Owens

Being a Gentleman

I heard the sound of Bernie Sanders giving the campaign away to Hillary Clinton at this week's debate. He said, "We're tired of hearing about your damn e-mails." You might as well switch off the TV at that point -- all softball questions for Hillary after that.

Hillary gets the nomination, there's no point in discussing it. The election itself is not certain. The Republicans are wild with energy. That's surprising. Republicans are not supposed to be surprising.They are are heading into unknown territory with their non-professional leadership. As a writer I appreciate Ben Carson breaking taboos and saying things that I might be too careful to say  -- he makes casual references to historic disasters. You're not supposed to do that. The rules are very clear. The Holocaust is an exclusive Jewish franchise. Slavery is for African-Americans. Sexual assault is for woman. Genocide for Native Americans and so forth. Each group has its franchise.

Carson, being black, is entitled to speak about slavery, but not the Holocaust.

I guess, he doesn't know any better.

I wish the Democrats had a non-professional in the race -- a rank amateur of some good social standing. I'm a Democrat. I always vote Democratic for President, except in 1996 when I voted for Bob Dole.

I voted for Bob Dole in 1996 because ..... that's a long story, you wouldn't be interested.

I voted for Al Gore in 2000. He could have won, if Nader stayed home. He could have won if the Clintons had helped him.

My political history is not interesting. We get to 2016 and I will vote for Hillary Clinton. She owns the Democrats. There's no choice. You can feel my lack of enthusiasm.

But here's story you might like. In 1988, Jesse Jackson was running strong for President on the Rainbow Coalition ticket. He was surging for the Democratic nomination. Me and lots of other folks in Skagit County were strong for Jesse.

We went to the county convention that summer, hundreds of Democrats sitting in folding chairs, and Debbie Aldrich gives us all a lecture. I remember it clearly and I will paraphrase her words. "Jesse Jackson is a great leader and we all love him, but he can't win the election in November. We need to back a stronger and more central candidate, we need to support Michael Dukakis because he can win."

Sheepishly we took off our rainbow clothes and we all supported Dukakis, who lost and is now forgotten.

We should have stuck with Jesse Jackson. Jesse would have lost, no doubt, but it would have been way too much fun.

So know we have Hillary, because she can win.

Nobody cares about 1988. How about 1956 when Adlai Stevenson got the nomination and threw the vice-presidential choice out to the convention. Jack Kennedy fought for the VP slot but he lost to Tennessee Senator Estes Kefauver. You remember that?

I do. I was ten, and we were coming back from California on a family vacation riding in a soft-green 1956 Buick, with Dad driving and Mom swatting kids, and all the windows rolled down, going 70 mph on Highway 66 back to Chicago.

We had the VP nomination battle on the radio that summer's day and it was very exciting. That was my first political memory.

Adlai Stevenson -- I wish he was here today.

Lots of Weather in California

We could get flash floods, brush fires  and an earthquake all on a Friday afternoon. That would be the California trifecta. I keep extra water and snack foods in my car, plus an interesting novel, a change of clothes, a blanket, some duct tape and wire, and a few tools such as an axe, a crowbar and a shovel -- plus a small tarp.

The thing is -- and let's be cheerful about this -- you could get stuck somewhere in your car and all of a sudden it's your home for the rest of the day. Be prepared.

Same with your home. Keep supplies handy, bottled water and candles, etc. I make sure we have plenty of coffee and the means to cook it. The rest I can fake.

Our uphill neighbor has been shoring up his terraces with extra pilings, as if he had a premonition of stormy weather. He wants to prevent his property from sliding downhill into our property. I hope that works.  We are going to make similar adjustments, hoping to steer possible rushing waters away from habitable sheds and stuff like that.

But the key to survival in California is to have no concern for the future. Smile every day. Laugh. Go to the beach and watch the pelicans. Eat lots of avocados. We're not going to change who we are, but just get better at it.

The Edison Eye. If you ever get to the Skagit Valley visit the Edison Eye, a wonderful art gallery in the small village of Edison.

The Eye was founded by my good friend Dana Rust. He died in 2013 and I miss him.

I had a dream about him. In the dream we visited the gallery and his wife Tony Ann Rust was there to greet us, and she looked great, all smiles and freckles and red hair, and the gallery all sparkled with freshly polished wood work.

But Dana was gone, in the dream. And when I woke up I felt sad. My good friend Dana Rust is gone.

I called Tony Ann the next day and told her about the dream and we had a good conversation catching up with old times. She used to be the teacher at Head Start on the Swinomish Reservation. That was thirty years ago when my two kids were pre-schoolers.

Tony Ann is doing fine. The Edison Eye gallery is under new management and doing fine and Dana has gone fishing in heaven.

Frog Hospital Subscription Drive.   Your contribution of $25 is greatly appreciated. The Frog Hospital newsletter has been cruising down the Internet for 16 years now. I have tried to kill this newsletter several times – tried to stomp it out like the ember from an old campfire, or dig it up like a pestiferous weed, but it won’t die – Frog Hospital just keeps on going.

So please send a check. Your contribution keeps me from getting cranky. It helps me to maintain a detached attitude. Let’s keep it going….

Go to the Frog Hospital blog and hit the PayPal button for $25,

or

Send a check for $25 to

Fred Owens

1105 Veronica Springs RD
Santa Barbara, CA 93105

 

--

Fred Owens
cell: 360-739-0214

My gardening blog is  Fred Owens

My writing blog is Frog Hospital

Syrian Refugees Begging for Relief and a Warm-up for Columbus Day

By Fred Owens

Syrian refugees begging for relief. Leaving aside all the pain and suffering, death and injury, abandonment and destruction -- leaving that all aside, think of the sheer embarrassment of knowing, and admitting to your self, and describing in detail to total strangers, that your country is falling apart.

Imagine for a moment that the Syrian people love their country as much as we love ours. And they would boast of its good fruits, its beautiful vistas and its ancient heritage. They would have such a natural pride in the good things and they would invite to us to come and share it.

All that is lost now. Now they have only the embarrassment of confessing that Syria is a shambles and they must beg for shelter and safety in other countries.

But it could be worse.

Vladimir Putin wants to help. Imagine that you have a very big problem -- a mortal illness, an unpayable debt, a famine, an epidemic. Imagine some total disaster that brings you and your family to the brink of death.

Then imagine that Vladimir Putin has come to help you. "You can trust me," he says, "I only want to help."

Putin has come to Syria to help the people. God save them.

Bernie Sanders. He's too old. As Senator or Governor I'll take the chance on his continued vigor, but as President I want somebody in the prime of late middle age, 55 to 60.

I won't vote for Bernie Sanders because he's a socialist. Socialists are not bad people, but they like to form committees and have long meetings and produce volumes of new rules and policies and procedures. I have no patience for that.

Hillary Clinton. She squats in the middle of the road like a 300-pound toad. She gets my vote and I expect her to win. I want to vote for the winner -- terribly shallow of me but true. She's the safest bet. She occupies the most central position and that's where you win elections in this country.

But could she please send her husband on a long-trip to Bulgaria? I'm really tired of that clown. He had his eight years.

The President's Spouse.  The spouse of the President should occupy an utterly non-political position, to be an esteemed architect or a research scientist  -- some field of great endeavor, but not political. I only vote for one person when I vote. We can praise Eleanor Roosevelt, but we should not repeat that pattern.

Monarch Butterflies. Migrating Monarch Butterflies have been spotted in Santa Barbara. The advance guard is flitting about here and there, in twos and threes. Might there be thousands or tens of thousands coming soon? They will roost in eucalyptus groves near the marine breezes for their winter's sleep.

We trekked out to Elwood Mesa this morning for our first butterfly jaunt. None were spotted in the trees, but they are coming in a few weeks, and the only question is how many.

Hail Columbia. Frog Hospital celebrates Columbus Day with great enthusiasm. On October 12, 1492, the whole world changed and for the better.

Samuel Eliot Morrison wrote the best book on the subject.....https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Samuel_Eliot_Morison

Admiral of the Ocean Sea

The Columbus Day Parade was the great celebration of Italian-American immigrants who were, and maybe still are, quite proud of him for being originally from the Italian city of Genoa..

Many places are named after Columbus -- the Columbia River, Columbia University, the city of Columbus in Ohio, the province of British Columbia in Canada and the nation of Columbia in South America.
We might consider Columbus to be the first immigrant and rename the holiday Immigrants Day, in celebration of all the people who dared to cross the great water to find a new home.
In 1491 there were no Jews in America, no Hindus in America, no Moslems in America, no Buddhists in America, and no Christians in America, but now we are all here and that is a good thing. In 1491 there were no Africans in America, there were no Chinese in America, and there were no Italians in America, but now we are all here and that is a good thing.
It was a good thing for all the peoples of the earth to discover each other..... Prior to Columbus we were in a state of mutual ignorance. It matters little what Columbus did when he got here, what matters is that he found the way, and kept good records, and made it possible for others to make the same crossing.

We celebrate Christopher Columbus for his voyage across unknown waters. He found the way over, and he found his way back. He showed the way and millions followed.

Some people dream of a pre-Columbian purity in a realm of utter paradise, but I don't yearn for the past. I look to the future. I am inspired by explorers and discoverers and wanderers. I am descended from people who were not content to pass the time sitting under the old chestnut tree, but my ancestors looked away yonder and wondered, "What lies over that hill?"

Hail Columbia!

Frog Hospital Subscription Drive.   Your contribution of $25 is greatly appreciated. The Frog Hospital newsletter has been cruising down the Internet for 16 years now. I have tried to kill this newsletter several times – tried to stomp it out like the ember from an old campfire, or dig it up like a pestiferous weed, but it won’t die – Frog Hospital just keeps on going.

So please send a check. Your contribution keeps me from getting cranky. It helps me to maintain a detached attitude. Let’s keep it going….

Go to the Frog Hospital blog and hit the PayPal button for $25,

or

Send a check for $25 to

Fred Owens

1105 Veronica Springs RD
Santa Barbara, CA 93105

Thank you very much,

--

Fred Owens
cell: 360-739-0214

My gardening blog is  Fred Owens

My writing blog is Frog Hospital